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Author Archives: Cheryl Ries

Rough Seas . .

14 Friday Nov 2014

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Attitude, Choices, Courage, Faith, Peace, Strength

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Faith, Perseverance, Strength

Life is pushing and pulling a lot of people . . rough seas ahead or already all around!
But rough seas are something in which we’ve all had to surrender, to live, to bide our time and to make our way before. They’re not new, perhaps just the reason for them is new now. It’s a new storm, a new condition, a new time of uncertainty and tenuousness. But we’ve gotten through them before, we must believe in our ability to ride these waves out too!    7aee159e3d-1

 

When life is pushing hard at us, our fears are rising, our troubles seem to be unending and our hopes are at risk of fading, what can we do? I suppose it’s easy to say this, because it’s not always easy to do this – but we can remain in faith, we can rest in God’s assurances and keep our peace regardless. But that’s impossible, you say!! “This is the storm of the century, these waves are too great . . I don’t deserve this . . this cannot be . . I’m already worn out”, and so on . . . etc., etc., etc.  That’s not to diminish how heartbreaking, heart-wrenching or how frightening this storm is! It’s not to impugn our fears, worries and doubts in this event versus others or those of others. It’s not about our expectation of what should be, or about comparing what is happening now to what happened prior, or even about what might yet be. It’s not even the case that we can measure our fear, pain or trauma against anyone else’s! 41Mqz+PSnBL

 

We have to find a way to roll with the big waves as they come, to survive as best as we’re able; and to expect that on another random, new, seemingly sunny day, another of life’s storms will develop. And when that next storm comes, will we be fearless, peaceful, prepared and know exactly what to do?? Probably not. But with the arrival of every one of life’s storms, because of what we’ve already been through, what we’ve already overcome and what we’ve learned about ourselves, we can confidently build our strength, perseverance and survivor muscles for this storm too! Confident that we’ve ridden other storms out and survived those . . our faithfulness in God will bring us assurance that we will see better days ahead with calmer seas, so our peace is much easier to maintain whilst in those storms!

Expect life, like the sea, to change on any given day in any uncertain way. That is the nature of the beast! But give yourself some peace and give God the burden of faithfully guiding you through these rough seas ahead!

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Discipline Brings Rewards . .

12 Wednesday Nov 2014

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Character, Choices, Commitment, Discipline, Lessons, Patience, Self-Control, Strength

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commitment, Discipline, Self-Control

When disciplining our own behavior brings us rewards immediately, our will is much easier to muster. But when discipline promises rewards which aren’t yet noticeable, haven’t yet paid-off with any “rewards” or given us much measurable success, we have to dig down deeper into our stores of will and perseverance. It’s then when we learn of what stuff we are made. It is then that we know how committed we are to whatever it is we’re trying to achieve, to accomplish or to be. dis

 

Our personal success might depend on others at times, it may rely in part on random occurrences which alter our course; but our successes are always a direct result and dependent upon how much will, determination, discipline and fortitude we choose to exert when things aren’t paying off or coming so easily! Our dig-down-to-it-ed-ness and our desire to be, do, have or make something come to fruition must be more worthwhile and prized than the weight of all the time passing, or how tiresome it becomes in process. 89281-Quotes+on+working+out+

 

Climbing up a mountain can be a grueling and tiresome venture. But at the top awaits the reward! There is a 360 degree vista at the apex which is like no other on the way up. There is the joy and sense of accomplishment of having made the ascent and done the hard work! Easy living rarely brings such tremendous uplifting victories to our soul by way of joy and contentment, much less by bringing such a boost to our self-worth or confidence. It is usually in the hard, endurance-worthy, time-contributed, sweat-raising, questionable matters by which we earn our greatest payoffs!

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There are gains in easy, no-sweat victories for sure. But not like the gains and rewards when discipline is a genuine investment! You can choose, do I sit out the hard stuff just because it requires more energy, time and will; or do I discipline myself for those matters which truly require it because they bring more to me in the end?! Signature02

Putting on the Lenses of Gratitude . .

27 Monday Oct 2014

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Attitude, Choices, Faithfulness, God, Gratitude, Positivity

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Blessings, God, Positivity

Yesterday a few friends and I were sharing our personal stories of extreme weather events, of enduring and surviving. It became so obvious from the first moments, that each of us was grateful for having been through what we had been unscathed. But it also became so crystal clear to us that our thankfulness went far beyond that! We were thankful, upon recollecting, for not having had to endure far worse! Each day, in every moment, lies infinite potential for better and worse. The very thing which makes it evident to us is our awareness in those moments of how grateful we are for what we have, for what we evaded and for how we are blessed!

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Good could be better. And perhaps we’re angry or upset that it was not. But in that state, did we take note of how it was still good and not bad or even worse?? Were we present in our blissful awareness to also be thankful that it wasn’t negative, or just worse?! We’re fabulous at pointing out how bad things are, or how we survived or lived through; probably because our pain, struggles or our hardships seem to garner us more attention by way of compassion, sympathy and empathy. But if we truly were present in each moment, we would soon see how very blessed we are and always have been! Good might surely have been better, but for everything, time or person who represented good to us in our lives, we were spared the worse things, times and people. And even if we encounter those things, times and people which are worse, it could have always been worse even yet!

 

549516_469832986380781_1137289488_nThankfulness reminds us of the breadth and scope of our life’s events as it focuses our limited attention to a wider range of possibility in assessment. Gratitude is a practice which only leads to more reasons to be grateful! Looking back at your life, I’m sure now you can see more reasons for which your life is meaningful, rewarding and valuable than ever before if you but put on the lenses of gratitude!

 

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Content With Myself . .

25 Saturday Oct 2014

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Character, Choices, Commitment, Discipline, Ethics, God, Life, Self-Control, Self-Esteem, Self-Respect

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Contentment, Love, Self-Esteem

The older I get, the more I realize that lite isn’t about changing myself to suit others or to please others or to follow anyone else’s lead. Life is about growing, changing, learning, and becoming whomever it is I was meant to be and being accepting of that person through it all! That means I live in step with my values, my beliefs and in an such a way as to uphold daily my character. It doesn’t mean that I look for ease in everything, expect everyone’s approval or think I know it all by now. It means that I’m not content in anything or with anyone else unless I first am content with myself – able to discern my own self-worth and to love myself regardless the presence or absence of others and in spite of all circumstances, including my own flaws and imperfections! And that contentment with myself is paramount to a life spent people pleasing, agreeing with or assuring others instead.

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It’s not selfish to do so, it’s self-preserving to live one’s own life for the sake of preserving one’s innermost core of values, beliefs and character; and most importantly, in preserving one’s own sense of self-worth, self-love and self-acceptance. Otherwise we might risk becoming yet another of the lost, seemingly-uncertain and unaware souls who don’t know their own value first and foremost because they’ve placed all measure and determination of that most critical appraisal in the tenuous hands of others or in the worth of things attained.

 

And don’t we see the obvious effects of those lost souls daily in our news broadcasts, in stories of such tragedies and loss? Those are the stories of people who aren’t able, at a time or in a moment to remember the value of their own lives, much less the lives of others. They’ve placed their own esteem in the hands of others, or lost it for themselves by not living in accord with their beliefs or values; or believed it was equitable to what they’ve accomplished or had achieved. Such sad stories when we know a person’s worth is priceless because it comes from God, were only all souls made known of that fact!   2608-character

 

Every person’s value is infinite! All of us face times of great consternation, pain and wearing-down of self; but those who live with awareness of their worth first through Him tend to persist through their life storms with more will and tenacity because they know unequivocally that critical  measure! They aren’t so-easily eroded by the influences of other humans or by the passing fancy of circumstance. Contentment starts by rooting in the firmament of God rather than in the shaky ground of mere humanity. 

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Facing the Storms, Fearlessly . .

22 Wednesday Oct 2014

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Character, Commitment, Confidence, Conquering Fear, Courage, Discipline, Integrity, Life, Self-Esteem

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character, Courage, Fear

 

 

It’s often fear, worry or doubt which makes us run from challenges, storms and the random turmoil of life; but then it’s failure, regret and insufficient results with which we are left in their wake! A part of us always loses when we walk (or run!) away from a challenge, cower in the face of our storms or let the circumstances of life keep us from living our life to the fullest measure. Pieces of our own integrity are lost, chunks of our self-confidence are eroded, and our own belief in our abilities is etched away.

 

Each challenge, storm, or difficult circumstance which we encounter in this life serves as an opportunity to provide to us so much in the way of personal growth and development. But not if we let fear, worry or self-doubt keeps us from facing it head on or ultimately conquering it. Every time we let those emotions win, we fail to realize the rewards of improved confidence, awareness and self-esteem for having bested them! A big life lesson is learned every time we push through . . accepting our challenges and relishing the lessons inherent in them!

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Many people choose to claim their challenges, their miseries and their life’s turmoil as badges of honor; but the real badge of honor is in beating it down and in besting it all! It’s in the overcoming where we become so much more than we imagined! So many people keep track of their losses, their failures, their miseries and the discord of life so that they can use the tally as an excuse to stay safely where they are; rather than realizing those same events and challenges provide opportunity for growth, change and understanding!

The fight to overcome what comes at us in life with courage and willful tenacity rewards us with confident, purposeful and deliberate growth, enhanced stability and assurances from within! School is in session each new day . . make it your goal to pass the tests of life as they appear with courage and tenacity; and to continue in developing your own potential as you progress through the years!

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This Is the Human World . .

16 Thursday Oct 2014

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Attitude, Choices, Confidence, Conquering Fear, Discipline, Faithfulness, God

≈ 1 Comment

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Faithfulness, God, Peace

Sometimes what seems so obvious isn’t. And what we think we know, we don’t. And what seems like truth is far from it. This is the world of mistaken perceptions, of unknowns and often, untruths. This is the human world, which lives by and in only limited human understanding. We may think we know how to do all, our egos may tell us we can fix this or change that; but we’re limited by our own abilities as human beings and by our own incomplete awareness. We’re not God, we’re not gods. We are all humans in a world where we and many other humans do our best and many others still do their worst. It’s the way of humanity.  2-chronicles-7-vs-14

The reason things here on Earth never feel quite totally safe or completely assured or in perfect working order are because they never will be when left in human hands. Someone will make a bad choice with consequential ripples; someone else will falter in their steps or another will purposefully act in discordant fashion, and others still will simply not know what to do at any given time.

Now should we be fearful of this daily reality? Should we live in complete despair at the knowledge of our own flawed humanness? Maybe and perhaps many shall and will. But for those who place all humans equally under the dominion of God, our humanity is expected and even understood. It is right, if not righteous. It is true, if not truthful. It is sure, if not assuring. So there is really no point in living fearfully, without peace or caught in the discord of any moment’s chaos. We’re not in the world of perfection or purity. We’re in the world where conflicts occur, where erroneous acts are perpetrated either purposefully or not. We’re in the world of humans, the fallen world. We’re in the world where really good, unselfish and compassionate acts of love occur as well; but that is because humans have within them the love of God. As for the rest, the negative or destructive, we have within us that potential because we’re humans.

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Only God can and does provide humans their path towards righteousness, their example of truthfulness and their worldly assuredness. I would expect, in those who don’t know God, this world is unsteady. To those who do, this world is not their focus, so none of its problems or posturing is either. Keeping eyes on Him and hearts in Him is the anecdote to fear, doubt, worry, trepidation, despair, depression, feeling lost, feeling unloved, the unknown and all that is of this world.              Signature02

Facing the Giants We Fear . .

14 Tuesday Oct 2014

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Commitment, Confidence, Conquering Fear, Courage, Faithfulness, Fear, God, Self-Respect, Strength, Trials

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Fear, God, Self-Respect

Fear is born from our need to process what we cannot, out of our longing to seize control when we aren’t sure we have any and through our inability to imagine how everything we might fear plays out without hurting us, irreparably changing us or negatively impacting our lives. That is fear . . it’s dreading and resenting something, someone or some set of events which represent change, disturbance and discord.

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Perhaps we fear a disease. Maybe we fear other people. Often we fear one thing so much, we refuse to do that out of fear – e.g. public speaking, flying, etc.. It might just be we fear all that is changing in our lives as we age, because we doubt our own ability to handle what comes our way. But fear is a liar. It doesn’t always adequately represent the truth of what we’re facing or even the truth of what will be. And fear is a liar in that it doesn’t take into account the power, strength, will and perseverance which might just see us through the times ahead. And fear again lies, because it forgets that we’re not alone. We have God!

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I believe it was in the movie “Facing the Giants“, (which is all about facing our daily fears and those incredible “giants” of things and people in life which we fear just because of who or what they represent) that I saw the reference to the number of times God mentions not fearing in His Word, found in the Bible. 365 separate times we’re told to not fear. I don’t expect He thought we wouldn’t feel fear or be fearful; but I believe He wanted to assure us 365 times that no matter the fear, the size of our giants or the battle ahead, we’re not alone – He is with us! Fear and our giants are not fought by us alone, He is with us. So it’s not our size, our fight or our abilities which matter. We must face things with courage, which surely takes effort and practice these days, but we can do so because of His abilities and His “size”! Don’t measure what you fear and your giants against your ability; measure the fear, the giants you face and the ability to best it all based on the all-powerful, promise-keeping and faithful Father! Give your fears their rightful rest in Him!

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What Others Think . .

13 Monday Oct 2014

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Attitude, Character, Choices, Confidence, God, Gratitude, Happiness, Humility, Love, Peace, Self-Esteem, Self-Respect

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Confidence, God, Self-worth

Often we think it matters more what others think of us, if we’re acceptable or alright in their eyes. But we mustn’t forget that what matters most in this world is how we appraise ourselves and who we are in God’s eyes. Others will have their opinions, fleeting, and based on their own limited knowledge and awareness. Perhaps they never fully know the inner workings of our hearts, minds and spirits. So basing our own self-appraisal on limited thought and consideration provides us with a limited or faulty appraisal. But God knows us through and through. We cannot hide who we are from Him! We cannot hide who we are from ourselves. It is all self-evident in our choices, in our family-lives, in our pursuits, in our hobbies, in our friendships and in our priorities. Spending time on developing the inner soul and sanctum means more in this life than any measure of outer approval rendered by any other means. We simply cannot ever be “enough” measured by anything external to us when such an appraisal is needed for just our ego’s sake. 15352_20130502_091007_Pali

 

We should always endeavor to be self-propelled and self-managed, rather than relying upon the conditional approval of others. When we cede our ego’s appraisal to any outside source, we lose pieces and parts, clarity and awareness, from our identity within. I’ve witnessed so many people nearly destroyed by not getting the favorable opinions or praise from others that should have been established from within them – by knowing who they are, by believing in and respecting themselves, by establishing themselves in the known love of God. 64181_290813230990390_109759299095785_738958_1742442314_n

 

Human appraisal is not sustaining and is need-based; but self-acceptance formed through His love and promises is! Self-acceptance, self-respect and self-love fully-formed out of knowing who we are and from where we rightfully come is undeniable, firm and indelible. It’s nice to have others affirm qualities about us or compliment us on various aspects of our lives or person; but what is even nicer is having genuine self-acceptance of all that God has created us to be, with our foothold in self-confidence, self-love and self-respect regardless the opinions of others!

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Confronting Fear . .

12 Sunday Oct 2014

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Attitude, Character, Commitment, Confidence, Conquering Fear, Courage, Fear, Lessons, Self-Control, Strength

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Courage, Fear

Living with fear can really put a damper on your life. It can stop you in your tracks, keep you from living fully and prevent you from growing into the best version of you that you can be! Fear is truly like a restraint laid upon our souls and spirits, whereby our movement, growth and success can be limited. We might feel fear for a genuine reason, such as a threat perceived; but if we don’t learn how to face that fear or to overcome fears, we end up giving our power to them! 0dc4d41d2712d6dd6f288b19d9dc4c2d

 

Fear is a challenge, in that by feeling fearful, we are forced to confront whatever it is we dread or doubt – before we can accomplish what we must. Fear is also the source of doubt within us as to our own abilities! When fear rears its ugly head, we might let it negate our ability to muster the courage required to do what we must in spite! Fear also depletes our confidence, pieces at a time! If we let fear win whenever we’re forced to confront it but don’t, we eventually diminish our self-confidence and self-respect in turn. There is nothing to do when we feel fear but to confront it!

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Fear is a rallying cry within us to muster up courage. Every time we muster that courage, we knock fear back to manageable sizes within us. Every time we don’t, however, fear then grows exponentially! If we leave fear unabated within us, so that it looms over our lives with increasing power; we will suffer a loss of self-worth. Fears are muscles we flex for numerous reasons; we aren’t certain, we have doubts or perhaps we don’t want to make mistakes. But instead of flexing the muscles of fears, we can feel it but then flex the countering muscle of courage! When we feel fearful yet act courageously to overcome or abate our fear, we can truly propel our maturity and growth as a result! As the saying goes, Feel the fear, but do it anyway!

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We Owe It To Ourselves . .

10 Friday Oct 2014

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Attitude, Character, Choices, Commitment, Courage, Discipline, Exploration, Fullness, Life, Self-Respect, Strength

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explorer, growth, Learning

We owe it to ourselves to understand the way things are, what we believe about the world and our place in it. We do no one, most especially ourselves, any good when we accept the opinions of others on face value or live our lives as echoes of others whom we view favorably or by fandom for their supposed celebrity. This is our life, our journey and our passage through it. If we aren’t going to make choices which reflect what it is that reflects our inner core of values and beliefs, then we aren’t going to have a life which feels comfortable and is meaningful to us. 01 Life Quote

 

Someone dear to me never ceases to amaze me in her insistent and persistent endeavors. She moves through life individually, and purposefully as such, attempting, learning and developing herself. She has a full life of experiences as a result! She might not be the master of any one thing, but she will be able to relish her participation in each and every manner in which she participates. Life is meant to be savored, tasted, tried and experienced. We’re meant to learn, to practice, to endeavor, to attempt, to challenge and to develop skills through all the challenges we master. We might not be proficient enough at some of those things to earn our income or to rely upon them for providing our sole support; but we can qualify ourselves as ably and aptly learned in such matters.

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But for those who don’t love or respect themselves enough to take the time to explore their own hearts and minds; to find preferences, skills, talents, abilities and acceptable beliefs, nothing is learned at all! Without first knowing a thirst from wanting to develop and grow because we believe ourselves worthy such endeavors, we won’t push ourselves beyond the familiar or the simple. And often the simple is to take what others say or do rather than to work on developing those preferences for ourselves.

Moving into the “explorer” mindset is as easy as knowing we’re worth such an effort! That person who is dear to me does what she does because she is feeding her soul. She is learning, developing and growing her mind, her talents, her abilities and her experiences because she is compelled by a desire to be a full, learned individual! Don’t accept what others have done or limit yourself to living vicariously through others. Find a way to challenge anew your heart, mind and your spirit to grow, to learn and to develop something new; and to realize who you are and what makes you tick! Imagine the life you can have when you assert your belief in yourself?! Just igniting that fire within you is to empower yourself to have the fullest, most interesting and experienced life possible.

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Cheryl Ries-Author & Model

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