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Category Archives: Empathy

Discovering Your Joy Within!

12 Tuesday Dec 2017

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Attitude, Blessings, Celebration, Choices, Christmas, Contentment, Empathy, Encouragement, Giving, Goodness, Hope, Inspiration, Jesus' Birth, Joy, Love, Peace, Positivity, Seasons, Strength

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Christmas, Contentment, Inspiration, Joy, Peace

I mostly wrote this five years ago this very day, but it seems to ring even more true for the world we are living in this day! The greatest challenge and endeavor in life is to learn the vital lesson of discovering your joy within! With that comes the importance of holding onto that joy peacefully and consistently, no matter the circumstances you are currently experiencing, all while reflecting that contentment as a light back into the world. None of us is immune to hardships, traumas, and problems in life or the catastrophic events beyond our control, but we have shared enough similar woes and life experiences to know that our inner joy is truly not a reflection of what has or will happen to us as much as it is a reflection of our choice as to how and what we feel, think, and believe about these matters! We choose how to summarily view our lives based on how we feel about what has happened to us. If we always cede our joy to feelings of despair, worry, anxiety, sadness, constantly mourning what we’ve lost over time, we erode the sense of joy we are meant to experience just by living! It’s as if we forget that our lives were filled with both happy and sad, ups and downs, laughter and tears. Anchoring our joy within ensures us that we won’t look back upon our lives in misery and despair!

We’re so well-equipped to love, to empathize, to be the face of compassionate caring for others once we have assured all of that for and within ourselves, by recognizing our own ability to keep our peace, joy, and contentment alive within our own soul and spirit! It’s so easy to harden from within with each trauma and every downturn. Soon enough, we have lost our ability to enjoy our own life or to help others enjoy theirs! By instilling in ourselves an indefatigable and rebounding joy within, we make ourselves almost immune to that habit of dwelling in perpetual despair! We may for a time mourn, ache, or hurt, but it need not take our life’s joy for all time! Perhaps we need only shift our focus more to the bright moments, the great times, and the things which we consider blessings, rather than focusing more often on what has grieved us or made us sad. And in just a time, that becomes the new habit!  

Find and hold onto your joy from within by habitually deciding to do just that! And then be a purposeful light for others, assuring them as to what joy, peace, and contentment can be for many who possibly need your leadership in that regard! It takes faith to live as a light, but the Lord sets a great example for us as to why we should! Shine your light for all the world to see, especially during this season of Christmas! You never know who might be inspired and led by your example in turn. There is enough darkness and despair in this world, enough sadness and suffering, reflect for others the way which leads them to their joy and light! And have a joyous season celebrating Christmas!   

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Speak the Truth…

09 Saturday Dec 2017

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Attitude, Character, Choices, Courage, Empathy, Encouragement, Ethics, Faith, Freedom, Inspiration, Kindness, Life, Love, Maturity, Strength, Trials, Truth

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Decision-making, Honesty, Knowledge, Lying, Reality, Truth

Sometimes we sugar coat things, thinking we’re sparing others upsets or upheavals. But, if we choose to deny anyone the truth by withholding from them the reality of a situation, we don’t really do them any service at all! Speak the truth, give the facts as you see them, relay honest appraisals whenever possible. Trust and deliver the difficult truths with kindness, compassion, and an earnest heart determined to help others.

Our challenge shouldn’t be how we can hide facts and the truth, for now, to protect someone we love from possibly being hurt, but rather our consideration should be how we can best deliver or present to others what they may need to know to make the most optimal choices for them, to face their dilemmas head-on as they are presented in life, while standing up to what they must! Some of the purposeful omitting or concealing we do may seem to soften a blow to others, but truthfully, it might also be that we don’t want to be responsible for having to give bad news or to burden another when they’re under significant duress! It might also be that in white-lying, omitting, or actually distorting reality, we are making assumptions about others which suggest that we believe them weak or incapable of facing reality. And that projection upon them might be a serious disservice to them!

The truth is truly what each of us deserves to know, process, and ruminate, even when that truth seems like a bitter pill to swallow or a hard left to our already-battered head! Some of the storms we face in this life actually provide great lessons and the impetus for significant and positive change, but if we’re always hiding in a shelter of our own making or in one provided too readily by others, we run the risk of missing those important life lessons! Not all storms can and should be evaded. They serve as necessary opportunities for individual growth and personal development! We have to give that chance to ourselves by facing each obstacle and trial in life head-on, but also others deserve that same opportunity! Honesty, reality, and truth are the power of knowing what to do, where to go, and how to proceed. The light of truth reflected in life is always preferable to the darkness of uncertainty and ill-preparedness. 

Two Weeks Notice . .

24 Monday Apr 2017

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Attitude, Choices, Empathy, Escape, Family, Gratitude, Lessons, Patience

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Empathy, Endurance, Gratitude, Patience, Sympathy

For most jobs you want to quit, you are advised to give a minimum two weeks notice. It’s considered polite and professional, as it enables both parties to contend with the shifting situation of the working relationship. An employee leaving his or her employment is giving the employer ample time to deal with the change in staffing. And an employer has that time to prepare, to replace, or to alter their staffing needs to accommodate such a change, if necessary. But there is one thing for which two weeks notice already seems too long and much too generous, and that is for a cold! I and other family members have had a cold now for two weeks, as of yesterday. We’re all more-than-ready to give this pesky illness our two weeks notice!  

Now let me interject first that I am usually never sick! I haven’t had a cold or any communicable illness for several years now. I don’t suffer from allergies, and I have a fairly strong immune system. But somehow, I brought this pesky and brutally persistent cold into this house. It could have been accidental contact with a “carrier”, and after the past two weeks, I would be prone to consider anyone who passed this beast on as such, HAHA! It could have been that I brought this on myself by working so hard in my garden in early April, preparing the landscape for the new warmer season ahead. For two weeks, I pruned, raked, swept, removed, and amended the landscape after Winter’s wear and tear. Perhaps something I breathed in during a profuse blooming season such as this one, or just the daily act of breathing in dust and spores firsthand, left me susceptible to spores, germs, or whatnot! However it came to pass, I can assure you this cold has worn out its welcome by now! 

For two solid weeks, I have done nothing much more than cough, sneeze, blow, rest and whine. And my family members have been my echoes in those activities! There isn’t much more we have felt like doing, even missing our Easter Sunday planned activities, and now we have passed the point of being tolerant of this forced schedule any longer. We didn’t want to spread this to others, so we endeavored to do as little as possible with our healthy friends, family, and strangers.  I admit readily that I am a most impatient patient! In fact, my family members and I have often discussed this particular version of the cold, pondering how we could be so done in by it. We’ve wondered if it is the gift that will keep on giving much longer, as we’ve had enough of all the symptoms and the remedies! But we have also pondered how those with chronic illness persist over time, enduring what they must with patience. This last two-week period with this cold has taught me to be immensely grateful for being so healthy usually, and to not take that normal state for granted ever! It has reminded me how wonderful it is to feel good! And of course, it has given me a whole new level of empathy and sympathy for those who must contend with health concerns far scarier, more intense, and more physically devastating than a cold! After all, in the grand scheme of things, a cold is relatively minor and we can envision the foreseeable future without it!  

But officially, I have given this cold my two weeks notice! I want to sever our ties, and break free from its hold upon my body and my life once and for all. I have things to do, places to go … well, you know the story! Two weeks just seems like long enough for a pesky cold with all its attending details. I don’t want to blow my nose, cough, take medicine or rest any longer. Time to move on, and I’ve given it enough time in all fairness. We all have! Since I gave this beast to my family members, as I was clearly the first one sick, I have also endured the guilt and shame of having passed such a monster to them! My mother, who also got sick while fussing over me, has proclaimed this the worst cold she has ever endured! Now surely giving your elderly mother such a beast as this is not something in which a daughter can be proud?! Today’s the day, it’s two weeks later, I’m moving on and so are the members of my family. We’re severing our ties with this particular virus! Adios, au revoir, auf wiedersehen and a big ciao to this two-week lesson in patient endurance! We’re surely saying our goodbyes with our renewed gratitude and our heightened empathy, lessons learned from our pesky “teacher”.   

 

A Big Tug Of War

24 Monday Sep 2012

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Compassion, Empathy, Giving

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A Big Tug Of War  

Sometimes the world seems like a big tug of war . . this one pulls, that one pulls harder back. If we all just committed to doing, being & giving our best, I believe the tug of war would inherently lessen!
If there were no perceived injustices, because we knew that we all were doing, being & giving our best to one another, then there would be no need to seek retribution or justice. We would just be able to relate to one another’s mistakes or inabilities because we were giving them the benefit of the doubt for just having done the best they could!

If we related to one another with humility, with empathy, compassion & a desire to treat others as we wished to be treated ourselves, ego & selfishness would take a backseat to the desire to be humane, unselfish, respectful, compassionate & polite. We need to be civil in the world to share it . . to show our humanity by individual acts which reflect that to others. First, it is up to each of us to mirror how we wish to be treated, for how can we expect in others what we haven’t nurtured in ourselves? Have a great new day!

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Cheryl Ries-Author & Model

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