Author Archives: Cheryl Ries

Giving Yourself the Best Gift in Life!

03 Saturday Jan 2015

Posted by in Choices, Commitment, Discipline, God, Integrity, Life, Love, Self-Respect, Strength

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The best gift you can give yourself this new year is just a commitment to be the best you that you can be, regardless the resolutions or the dates on any calendar. For to be endearing to oneself is to live authentically, looking out for what is best and not sacrificing what lies within for anything external. What is best for our lives doesn’t reflect the hopes and dreams of anyone else in any other way but us. 389700_143684792428166_1758732618_n

Our life is a grand work of physical, emotional and behavioral artistry, created, designed and shaped ’til perfection by our handiwork. Our life is the collective workings of God’s mastery brought into being through us and every choice we’ve made since. And now that we’re responsible, it’s up to us to master the every day decisions, choices, parameters and emotions which help us to create the inner and outer being of our heart’s desire. When choosing all of that, don’t look at the current trends or try to reshape your life to resemble those of others. They didn’t start with your gifts or your talents or even looking like you! We are all gifted with lives uniquely and independently formed. Why would we seek to make ourselves anything other than us?! 59883870015945867_v4vbtfZ1_c

Our greatest aspiration each new day should be to live authentically in the way we are made to be; with our dreams the priorities which motivate our actions and our behaviors. Our inside growth is more important than anything we shape and do on the outside, for transforming from the inside out gives us the power to work with everything we have, everything that happens and every change which may come to influence us from within and on the outside. If we encounter something life-altering in our journey, we then have the strength, integrity and self-love first from within to not let it change us as we are. We must hold fast in personal integrity, which means staying true to who we are regardless what comes to pass, what happens in our lives or even what may alter our physical being! How does someone lose a part of themselves, say an arm or a leg, and not become someone else in the process? It’s because they are first aware of what lies within, loving that person inside and out! 

If we know we are masterpieces first created by God’s hand, then all of our choices from then on become about making our own lives the reflection of that thankfulness and honor we believe He deserves for that! Living your best life means standing up for what you believe, doing what you must to maintain your being inside and out, as well as loving oneself enough to know each choice and every step reflects all of that!    Signature02

Joy, Peace and Contentment Are Mine!

20 Saturday Dec 2014

Posted by in Attitude, Choices, Contentment, Faith, God, Gratitude, Joy, Peace

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When I give my attention to the still, silent world around me in the early pre-dawn hours, I hear the most beautiful and unique bird songs! When I open my window coverings in time to see the sun rising, sometimes I get the most vibrant show of color even for only a few fleeting moments. When I smile at a stranger, often I’m rewarded with one in return. When I await the few geese that fly over my house each morning, I feel a familiarity with their routines. When I water my plants, I take on a sense of caring which enables me to nurture and to tend to them. When I look out upon the landscape throughout the day, I am rewarded with the sights of animals and nature going about their business. When I go to church on Sunday, I find a communion with other joyful believers which feels like a community of which I am a part. When I seek, often I find! And when I spend my first few minutes of consciousness both morning and night in prayer, with His Word and in my purposeful gratitude, I can realize the world and my life not as one driven solely by despair, discomfort or disquietude. Instead, I am rewarded with the most amazing peace of mind, heart and body! 82   What a joy it is to know that no matter what comes my way, God has given me enough within to overcome what I must and to be grateful for what I have! Just by focusing my mind, my heart and spirit upon that which brings me joy, peace and contentment, I change my whole life’s perspective. Life is happening all around and often times, it is chaotically prescribed and dosed. But that doesn’t mean I have to dwell in the chaos or fill my soul with it! The choice as to what and to whom and as to how I give my attention, place my focus and expend my energy is always up to me! The world may deliver screaming, shrill distractions, it may bring moments of trauma, heartbreak or even the unimaginable; but the state of my mind and my heart is within my control. What matter fills my thoughts and my emotions is mine to decide. Signature02

Choose the Challenging Road . .

11 Thursday Dec 2014

Posted by in Character, Choices, Commitment, Conquering Fear, Courage, Discipline, Lessons, Opportunity

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We do ourselves no favor when we look for the easiest way out or the way of least resistance every time! I choose the stairs because I know that habitual choice does more for me than an elevator. A flight of stairs is harder, the elevator often more convenient and easier; but the stairs does something for me physically which the elevator can’t! And so, I choose the stairs most times. In all the ways life was made easy for me by choice or by circumstance, I responded with less change, less growth and less will. In every way.               imageschallenge1

 

When we aren’t challenged, we don’t grow, change or become stronger. Look at someone who truly has overcome significant challenges and see if you aren’t truly inspired! Life is in our challenges and how we do in fact overcome them or at least endeavor to! There isn’t much to say about evading, eluding or ignoring challenges . . and so there isn’t much we can say about our lives when we have or when we do evade, elude or ignore challenges most of or all the time. We’re meant to develop, learn, overcome and to experience change all of our lives. Shutting down that process by means of self-doubt, self-protection, fear or even an apathetic attitude towards growth doesn’t serve any purpose but to instill a false sense of acceptance about a life which then stagnates.

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Push yourself to stand up to the fears and doubts which could otherwise prove crippling. Take a stance against your own urge to run, to evade or to always choose ease. And when others give you the easy way, or life proves itself too simple, challenge yourself to more! And if you believe your life has already been too challenging, hence your desire to not experience anything but ease; I suggest you take a look at how much personal growth and what lessons were hidden there within everything you have had to overcome! There isn’t much you’ll gain from a life without challenge, without test or trial and sans difficulty. But in the throes of what seems challenging, there is much to learn, much to overcome and much by which we make ourselves better! Perhaps it is just the perspective . . challenges aren’t all bad, negative or hard. In challenges lies great potential for change, opportunity for growth and life lessons!       Signature02

 

Living In The Present . .

09 Tuesday Dec 2014

Posted by in Attitude, Choices, Conquering Fear, Contentment, Happiness, Lessons, Self-Control, Wisdom

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Have you thought at times how wonderful it would be to live someplace else? Rather than here, rather than now, for dwelling someplace other than in the current situation might seem like a rewarding way to live life; it might seem like an escape! After all, don’t we often dwell in two other sought-after places as much as possible as a means of escape or as a way of providing ourselves comfort from the here and now? 

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We often travel to the past, a destination which cannot be changed; which has a great hold on our emotions and our psyches. There in the past, we think we can find a solution to our present woes; or perhaps we think we can find a way to heal something which was broken or fix something which faltered. If only our reasoning in regards to the past were able at this time, this day and for this particular subject, to lead us like a detective to some light-bulb moment which we could change back then. If only we could alter in our own minds the steps which led back then from A to B, we would now realize our current residency in C would be more acceptable and not such a source or contention or dismay. If only! 

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And often we desire travel to the future, a place which remains unknown no matter how hard we look or how far we try to see.  We have such high hopes of altering our current state of life by learning about what the unknown future holds for us. Like wayward time-travelers, if we could just take our capsule to the farthest reaches of some galaxy ahead of the here and now, we would know for certain that what we’re doing now is laying the appropriate groundwork for what will happen to us then. We could see what to fear, or what to evade or know for certain so many aspects which make up the great body of uncertainty looming ahead. Perhaps we think by knowing what is coming and when, we will in some way be better prepared for living these present days sans error, mistakes and heartbreaks.

 

Sadly, both destinations truly cannot really make the here and now any better; but we insist upon spending a great deal of time preparing to go, musing our emotions and reasoning away our thoughts about both travel spots! Do they really serve as an escape from the here and now; or are both destinations often detrimental to our enjoyment and our contentment of the here and now? I would guess that more often than not, traveling and spending too much time in either the past or the future leads us to less pleasure, comfort and peace in the here and now! Life is occurring right here and right now. If we gave our energy and turned our thoughts to how we might be content and at peace with the current state of things, we might realize how very blessed, how very fortunate and how very comfortable things are for us. And if we feel today is fine as is there is no need to draw anything but lessons from the past and to live with hope for the future! Comfort, peace and enjoyment now require no escape! All of that comfort, peace and enjoyment now comes through acceptance of the past, known and unchangeable; and faith in the future, sight unseen. Live for today and in today; let yesterday be but a guide and tomorrow, just a hopeful promise.

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Overcoming . . The Driving Force Within

05 Friday Dec 2014

Posted by in Choices, Commitment, Conquering Fear, Discipline, Growing, Lessons, Strength

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Overcoming . .  why do we doubt our own abilities to attempt, to persevere and to ultimately overcome? Fear, anxiety, worry, regret, and all the other obstacles we perceive before us shouldn’t stop us from pursuing the life we desire; especially if we learn to give ourselves credit for all the overcoming we’ve already done! It even started long before we became aware that overcoming was what we were doing!!!

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We overcame the process of childbirth, since we’re here. We then overcame the years of helplessness, in infancy and toddler-times, when we depended upon so many others to get us through. We survived that! And we then overcame growing up into childhood, one long and often painful step at a time. We went from not even being able at some point to hold up our own heads, to one day plunging forward into learning how to walk. It was a long process of persevering through missteps and teeters which resulted in stumbles or even falls; but we wanted to learn so much more than the weight of our own reasoning, fears or doubts! Then we were sent off to school and had to learn many more ways to overcome by learning and by growth. And every day since, we’ve learned to overcome something just to get where we are today.

Life is all about overcoming, surviving and thriving regardless the challenges which are inherent in the process! Humans seem to be the only living beings which give so much credence to their emotions and feelings, so that we can actually think or feel our way out of challenges essential to our development! We learn through life to process fear, worry, anxiety and doubt with more weight than we knew to give all of that in our childhood. Adulthood often enables people to learn some bad and/or negative ways to not overcome. But overcoming is what we’re supposed to do! All through life, until our death, we’re meant to move forward, to learn, to develop, to change and to grow.

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When we let fear, doubt, worry, anxiety, apathy or any other negative we perceive hold us down or back, we are only hurting ourselves! Each of us is given things to challenge the inner muscles of overcoming all through life; were we to keep our distance from all those challenges, all of life, where would we be now?? I guess the baby would have chosen to stay in utero, the child in the bliss of the crib and the youngster in kindergarten. But we weren’t able to render ourselves stagnant then, why should we endeavor to do that now??

Seize the power found within your spirit of overcoming! It is there to propel you through all the challenges and tough times in life! Be your own best friend, don’t talk yourself out of development, growth or forward movement, just because it represents a challenge or tough times ahead. You’re already an overcomer! You just need to believe that is the truth about YOU!

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Comparison, The Thief of Happiness . .

03 Wednesday Dec 2014

Posted by in Attitude, Character, Choices, Contentment, Lessons, Positivity, Success

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One person excels at singing, another exemplifies the idyllic beauty, another can paint a masterpiece on a blank canvas, someone else is able to teach young minds about a waiting world, and another can slice open a human body with precision and care. We’re all given differing abilities, talents, skills and interests as a specific set of gifts unique to us. When we start to assume that there is a way to measure equity between gifts or that our gifts should be equitable in comparison to those of others, we are already losing the intrinsic worth of those gifts!

Often times, human beings try so hard to make things fair because they’re caught up in a game of comparison. Comparing me to you and you to others and others to even more people can only find someone lacking and others in want. Life isn’t designed to seem the same for each of us or to bring us the same results; there is no equity or “fairness” to be had in life when we each start out in different places, with different assets and limitations, or with varying skill sets and gifts. There is simply no way to compare your apple to my orange. Our only similarity is in our humanness. Other than that, we are a mixed bag of individuality; belonging to various subsets! We should give up our desire to see equity for things and fairness in things which first haven’t any set value in the world; but are seen as personal traits, skills to be developed and unique talents in which we have ability.

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Yes it would be lovely to sing like some great pop star, to have the ability to use my voice to make millions and to be famous. And yes, it might be wonderful to be a successful brain surgeon, so that I might help to heal the world with my talents. And surely it would be great to have the hair, skin, body or feature of another human being. Or it might be fabulous to be or do anything someone else has been able to do, with seeming ease! But I cannot follow in anyone else’s footsteps but step forward with my own! And so I owe it to myself to stop comparing myself to others in whom my similarities may be limited to female, human and perhaps a few other insignificant commonalities. imagescomparison3

Comparison is a terrible waste, for it leads us to believe we’re always lacking! And comparison is a thief, in that it reminds us that others seem to have more! And comparison is a killer of dreams, in that it teaches us we might not be as capable with our skill set as others have been! If only we could let go the need to compare our lives to those of others! If we focus on living for ourselves, the lives we are best meant to live, without the constant need to assess and measure the results of others in theirs. Perhaps we would all live happier, more contented lives sans comparison; with more self-respect, greater self-confidence and a genuine self-love. Signature02

The Crutch of An Excuse . .

02 Tuesday Dec 2014

Posted by in Character, Choices, Discipline, Ethics, Self-Respect, Strength

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Making excuses for other people can be a slippery slope, as often we’re enabling them or giving them permission to keep on doing as they will with no recourse or reproach. It can render us silent when we should be anything but. But worse than that is to make excuses for ourselves by using others as our foil! When we do that, we hide from consequences, we pass the buck of personal responsibility and we shun the burden to behave, to think and to speak as we know we should!

 

There are far too many people these days that have learned it’s easier and more convenient to pass the fault and the blame for their own lives being in ruin onto others. Making those excuses becomes a crutch on which they stand progressively more and more each new day! Instead of learning how to heal from life’s battles, to strengthen self or to develop beyond their own mistakes and failings, they rely upon the handy excuse of “blame the other guy” or “it’s his or her fault, not mine!” or the often used, “I give you all responsibility”.

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It has become so easy to lob insulting rhetoric, bombastic opinion and to evade personal responsibility by claiming a constant state of victimhood rather than to learn to grow and develop through discipline and effort, past or beyond some situation or life event! Once upon a time, when someone was born in a supposed disadvantaged state, the person would be encouraged to work through the factors of such a  perceived disadvantage as poverty, minority class or handicap for their own sake, so that by strengthening their inner stamina and will, they would excel in life beyond the state of their present set of circumstances. Now however, we’ve learned victimhood presumed by a “disadvantaged” state of birth, life choices or unfortunate circumstances as a sport, as a hobby and as a profession! It is easier to render people immobile and functionless based on so many factors which are surmountable and should even encourage the opposite purely by their accepting this new sport of victimization!

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Society now has exonerated from personal responsibility and disciplined living entire swaths of people collectively based on a growing desire to evade the onus of responsibility and commitment to change! Human growth has stalled in the forest of overgrown weeds of unloving, uncompassionate and immature souls incapable of personal development much less living amidst communities as responsible citizens. The “me” has replaced the “we” with a deadened thump upon the soul’s impetus to grow, develop and mature through so many perceived negatives and overall hampering; that now, many souls have stagnated in muddy puddles of darkened uselessness, apathy and victimization! God made us to be so much more for His effort. How sad when we choose to make such ready excuses for ourselves by placing the blame consistently and constantly upon the backs of others in whom we can secure our victimhood! We are self–fueled and self-propelled, lest we forget the origin of our Divine Creator’s handiwork in us! No one is accountable for our lives but us. Signature02

 

Are You Content?

28 Friday Nov 2014

Posted by in Attitude, Choices, Contentment, Fullness, Gratitude, Happiness

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Are you content? On this day, when we see people clamoring to add more to their stockpiles of possessions because they don’t yet have enough, can we answer that question for ourselves? Am I content in life? If this were all I were to have, or to be, or to make, or to accomplish, or to be given in terms of longevity . . if this were all, would I be able to say I am content as is?

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Contentment is the secret to peace and happiness, for it affords to us the assurance that we are accepting of our own lives, our own accomplishments, our own journey’s events and steps taken. We can still aspire to make our yet-unaccomplished goals a reality; but our contentment is an appraisal of the here and now, based on the past unchanged and the future yet unknown.

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If we’re not content, we often look for things outside of ourselves to bring us joy; but things or other people apart from us cannot manufacture peace of mind or be our source of joy or contentment within us. It is up to us to discern within, am I content; so that we ourselves might deem this life as acceptable! And if not, why? As Paul states in the Bible, in the Book of Philippians 4: 11-12 . . Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low, and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and need.

 

No manner of Black Friday purchase or addendum of any person can change our sense of contentment with life for the long-term. All that we discern as meaningful for our lives and about our lives must be formed from within our grateful hearts and our peaceful minds, here and now!

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The Recipes of Life . .

21 Friday Nov 2014

Posted by in Attitude, Choices, Confidence, Faith, Lessons, Patience, Peace, Quitting

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I am trying a new recipe this morning, and I was starting to get a bit concerned about whether or not it would work. It’s one of those with yeast, which requires a period of activation and rising to do its part. And I hope it will turn out well, but I see a parallel with life in this simple task of hoping in the yeast to do its part. Life for the most part is a series of actions, purposeful and not, which add up to some outcomes and consequences which either seem positive or negative by our appraisal. So life is just a sequence of things we hope for and changes we make when our hopes are dashed. No big deal! 23-09-2013-00-Success-Quotes

 

Why then do we put so much emotional weight on everything we haven’t got a full grasp of control upon anyway?? Do we suppose that we’re better-fated, better-intentioned or just better than others – so that everything should go our way? Even if we’ve prayed and asked God for His favor in something, it doesn’t mean that He will agree that we’re making the right steps, moving in the right direction or are ready for whatever it is we’re looking to find, do or be! Relax; life is about starting some recipes, attempting new things, trying to make something from nothing by mixing intentions, aims and hopes all together. And if at first you don’t succeed, try, try again! Don’t get so discouraged because it wasn’t easy, perfect or natural for you. If you happen to get fortunate with whatever it is you are attempting, then great! But if it doesn’t work after a while and a few go-arounds, perhaps look for a new “recipe” or way to do what it is you wish to!178962_476497912365218_1729959021_n

 

Don’t let the emotional weight of doing, being, making and hoping overwhelm the entire process. Life is all about the trial and error, the endeavoring and the accomplishing, learning and growing in ways you might not yet have even imagined. But don’t give up hope that you’ll either make this recipe or some other way ultimately work. Discouragement doesn’t taste as good as finding the right recipe!

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Prisons of Our Own Making . .

17 Monday Nov 2014

Posted by in Attitude, Choices, Confidence, Conquering Fear, Fear, Positivity, Strength

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There just comes a time when carrying a perceived burden, problem or uncertainty becomes too weighty for me, so that the resolution, solution, or just plowing forward into the uncertainty becomes a necessary relief. And so it is . . we have to release ourselves from the prisons of our own making!

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We often choose to remain focused on things which we fear, by way of doubts, which we want to evade and for which we find procrastination an ease; but when the burden upon our minds and hearts becomes too much to bear one more day, we often release our own inner-kraken or monster of forceful energy, determined to change the circumstances! We have to; we’ve spent too much energy, time and focus on those things in the first place. Otherwise we would live in such emotional torment, such consternation, with such a sense of dread about what might be or may be or could happen at any minute.

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Upon bottling up our emotions, our energy and our focus for so long on problems, eventually the problem itself provokes us to do something. It’s inevitable when the weight gets so heavy on our souls. Unless we’re hiding the effects of such things, by distracting ourselves to the point of not recognizing burdens, problems, and such; we will eventually erupt like a volcano, pushed to the tipping point for our own sake. So it is almost always better for us dealing with things before we reach the point where those things have pushed us to the point of dealing with them!

 

When we’re proactive, we often aren’t so dis-empowered, so fatigued or require such hasty thinking as when we’re retroactively reactive. But even if we wait until we cannot wait one more day, we must go forward with confidence; knowing that procrastination, ignoring or just wishing things away doesn’t usually work or resolve anything. There is no better time than the present to believe yourself a capable life-manager, who is able to cope with and to resolve all the situations life delivers to your door! No better time than the present to be proactive rather than just reactive! You may not fix things in a moment, a day or even have all the answers; but evading, avoidance and delaying the inevitable are going to wear upon you in the meantime. See your problems and your concerns as managerial duties of your life; the better you are at managing all of that, the better your life becomes!

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