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Category Archives: Strength

We are so Focused…

27 Thursday Mar 2014

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Courage, Faithfulness, Integrity, Self-Control, Strength, Success, Wisdom

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blog_tsunami-50We’re so focused on what we’ll become that we often forget to develop fully first what we are. You cannot build a big, busy building upon a weak foundation. It will ultimately crumble from the weight of itself. Without a foundation based in integrity, without doing things the right way, any edifice built might look good from the outside, but the innermost facets will fall into weakness, decay, and then ultimately ruination.

You cannot live exclusively for the sake of your flesh ignoring your inner structure of soul and spirit, for like the building erected without proper foundational support, you will falter, grow weak, and further erode until you collapse. You must build your life’s foundation first, and then work on building the rest from that! What makes a great foundationThe Ability-50 for each of us personally? Well that varies by choice, be degree & by our history. But the common components of foundational strength are those of character – integrity, ethics, respect, honesty, confidence, kindness & responsibility, to name a few – which are the constant ingredients to a solid foundation upon which to build a successful, strong & busy life!

We are empowered to live and to grow as well through our connection to God, having faith and a desire to honor Him in our endeavors. As Aristotle mused, “We are what we repeatedly do!” If we make it our goal to build up our foundation as we endeavor to build our lives by repetitive practice, we will then be compelled to seek those things which foster our growth, fuel our success and enhance the possibility of achieving our goals. The nature of a life based on such superficial matters as our flesh and what feeds and fosters it, with no purposeful desire to grow, to mature or to develop fully the spirit and soul, is always one which is more limited.

With integrity and other solid character components in place as a part of our foundation, we make all our choices and take all our steps in accordance to the barriers and parameters we’ve established accordingly. Integrity prevents us from going beyond our own preset limits in behavior, thought and in our speech. Integrity compels us to act with discipline. We censor ourselves and self-discipline because maintaining our integrity is tantamount to our venturing beyond those limits.

stability-and-loyalty-with-two-trees-25The focus of our life is often skewed towards that which brings the most instantaneous satisfaction – that being on things which serve our flesh and its needs first. But the life built on a solid foundation, which nurtures the growth, maturity and the development of our body as well as our spirit and soul, will prove to be the key to a longer-lasting and more-rewarding life over all!

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The Ascending Ladder of Life . .

11 Tuesday Jun 2013

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Character, Choices, Conquering Fear, Courage, Inspiration, Strength

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All of life is like rungs on an ascending ladder meant to carry you to the level where you are now, with some rungs representing life events & choices below & some infinite number yet above you. That is how it works, the events & choices we make carry meaning, either positive & negative, causing our reactions & actions. We either let ourselves be defined by something positive which occurred  and resulted in  ascending the rungs to the next level, or we let our circumstances & the inherent negativity within them, take us into a descent.
Some people have allowed life to beat them down after so much perceived negativity or uncertainty that they believe themselves to have risen no higher than where they first started. Or worse, they choose to stay off the ladder! Their attitude has no altitude, so they as well no longer take any risks by climbing up any higher. Others have been knocked down a few times, or often even, but always consider their goals & dreams for this life to be worth taking that risk of falling or failure! They may have even been shaken off their ladder from a great height, falling flat & hitting rock bottom, but they still desire the heights at the top, so they continue to climb!
Each of us has to determine our own will, our own fearlessness & our own endurance for climbing. But life IS an uphill climb, it is always ascending, that is a given & that is our challenge to take! How we contend with it all, our attitudes & our ability to control our own emotions determines the pace of our ascent & our final altitude upon life’s completion. We might prefer the ground level, we may enjoy some place in between, but we should remember our abilities are limitless, we are meant to challenge ourselves to reach great & unexpected heights by reaching the clouds! Often times though, what we deem acceptable is merely our fear, our worry, or our tired-out will doing our thinking for us!
ladder-of-life50Ladders take us higher than the places upon which we can stand while on the ground, they serve a purpose in lifting us up, in helping us to see new vistas & perceiving  new points of view. You are only assured of that when you face your fear.  Step up willingly onto each new rung, risking the falls but continuing to climb! You were meant to see each new rung not as something dire, but as a step towards your destiny! Enjoy the climb, for as Jack discovered when he ascended the beanstalk – although there are challenges & fears which must be met upon the way, the only place  to find the magic beans is up!!
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Thankful for My Normal . . .

11 Tuesday Jun 2013

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Character, Choices, Commitment, Family, God, Gratitude, Integrity, Lessons, Life, Love, Strength

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Tags

Love, thankful, Thankfulness

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When I see the normal to which others ascribe, I want to drop to my knees and am thankful to God for my sense of normal! My life has been far from perfect, idyllic or even one of privilege, but my life has been perfectly idyllic in what blessings I have had! I have been richly blessed for instance with parents who did their best, never turned from or shirked their responsibilities regarding home & family, especially their children. In fact, they worked hard & diligently to provide what we needed whenever we needed it. They were not from wealthy families, in fact, my father was the first member of his immigrant blue-collar family to go to college! He deliberately took the time to consider all of life’s options, choosing quite wisely for his family when moving us as his job demanded . . which we did many times as kids.
He took great care when picking houses he could afford in the best areas he could find, he checked out the school & the districts, even when accepting his new positions he weighed the impact of all its benefits upon us, his family. When laid off, he never quit looking for work even though it would sometimes be a lengthy process of hundreds of interviews & rejections, with him flying around the country to look for what might work. He never considered his failing to provide as even being an option. He just did what he had to do & always held his confident demeanor with us.  My parents both never bought more than they could afford, qualified for every home & lived on a wing & prayer when they had to move us during one of my father’s relocations or promotions, hoping the current one would sell so that they could buy one in the new location.
My mom actually lived without a car, with three kids all of school age, for over six months back east, in snowy weather, as my father had to take the only one we had to drive out west for his new job. She relied upon my grandparents to come down to her house from a state nearby each weekend to take us all out for groceries & to do errands. That was just what had to be done, & we were all a willing part, no one gave up, left or got bitter or resentful about it. We never considered it anyone else’s problem, just a part of our family’s life of sometimes struggling but definitely loving!
Life isn’t always easy & without struggle, sometimes it requires cooperation among family members, it might require getting by with less for a while or compromising on having all the toys because we have kids. We have to learn to do what we need to do for each other, instead of expecting others to do for us or just taking what isn’t rightfully ours. This retrospective look keeps me earnestly aware of how impatient we’ve all become, expecting things right away, not knowing how to wait upon or work as hard for things which we might have. I see the normal of some people & although my normal was not always perfect, I will take it & be thankful for it, as it taught me that love doesn’t quit on hard times, it doesn’t walk away from duty & responsibilities, it doesn’t stop feeding, clothing & housing or expect things when it’s just not the right time.
Love is patient . . love endures . . love is what remains when everything else material & thus inconsequential passes. I might not have always had the dream life, my family might not have lived in a castle, but we surely had enough of anything that mattered . . & still do! This is what family means, love without cost & worth any price!
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Life is in the Lessons . .

23 Tuesday Apr 2013

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Choices, Life, Strength, Trials

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life_lessons_and_lattes-50Life is in the lessons . . we’re not always happy to open our texts & study for them, & sometimes we just get those obnoxious pop quizzes, but we must learn to exuberantly pass them if we wish to stop having to relearn the lessons & stay where we are!
Lessons are the vehicle of our transport beyond this stage of life, without them we would remain forever behind a “grade” & thus, we’d be always looking around us at the new faces of those who’ll pass the grade successfully or we’ll see the same faces of those, who like us, are stuck! I don’t know about you, but I didn’t ever like the idea of being held back when I was actually in school . . and I surely don’t like that concept now in the “Hardknocks School of Life!” I diploma_school_of_hard_knocks-Cheryl-50consider myself an able & ardent learner, a good student even, so if it requires my learning a lesson I’m not all that fond of in life. To be considered a good student, just as when I had to learn & pass geometry, I will make it through no matter! Some life lessons stink, but we have to have faith that the lesson will lead us to a better place & a better us!
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Sowing Seeds With Faith . .

06 Wednesday Mar 2013

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Character, Choices, Commitment, Confidence, Faith, Strength

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Sow seeds of faithAs every gardener knows, myself included, the seeds you sow or plant today, is your hope & faith for tomorrow & beyond. It takes great faith being a parent, to enter into relationships, to sow seeds with faith that they will become something one day. Examine all the amazing ways you show your faith each day just by living your life! Maybe we humans are much more hope-full than we even realize & give ourselves credit. Living with faith, maintaining our hopeful resolve no matter what life brings, is truly what keeps us filled  with the endurance to love ourselves & one another, to keep sowing our seeds anew each day for what lies ahead!

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The Storm Mindset . . .

26 Tuesday Feb 2013

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Character, Choices, Conquering Fear, Joy, Strength

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 The mindset of the storm. girlinstormSometimes what happens in the world seems overwhelming, the losses we endure, the infliction of such immense hardship, the problems piling on people like weights pulling them under water. Humans can feel so fragile & so broken at times, that they wonder if breaking further & being broken is a constant state. When hope wanes & eventually dies within us, we have nothing in which to bolster our reason for being.
Hope is what sustains us even through the unimaginable. We must hold on to our hope, having faith that at some point ahead of us, even around a bend, there is a new day waiting which does promise smiles & an abundance of light. Too many of us are so lost in the dark storms of tumultuous times, grief or uncertainty for which we can’t imagine a passing, that we relegate ourselves to the mindset of the storm always. Then we don’t even notice that the “everyday” has returned, our lives would be better, our skies are brighter .  We are still, however,  in the storm mindset, our feelings keeping us there almost like a prisoner. When you have a sense that your hope is waning or grasping its last breath, please find the spark within you that calls it back! Life will often bring many storms to weather, but they do eventually pass. Don’t make one storm from now or before your constant sky! Please remember that like all things, bad days, problems, turmoils & upsets do pass! Brighter days are always just ahead, perhaps around an unseen bend, but they’re coming! Hope within you must be stoked & coaxed like a fire, you might have to add kindling & allow it to surge again. You shouldn’t have to relight it though, as hope does always live within you if you just keep the embers from dying in your heart!
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This is dedicated to those who struggle with those emotions they just cannot seem to elude . . for all of you who make judgments based on a moment of feeling something now which will pass if you just ride it out! Life is a precious gift, hope is what allows our faith to endure all while we wait, endure, persist & to prosper! Let your hope take you with faith into this new day, resting assured that you will find something in which to be thankful in this gift of life! You’re the one who determines which emotions you ride to shore, after all!

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Hoist the Sails, Life Awaits!

25 Monday Feb 2013

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Choices, Commitment, Confidence, Conquering Fear, Strength, Trials

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action shot-200Many times in life, we push ourselves too hard, & then we pay some price in physical or emotional pain. But for some things we don’t push ourselves hard enough, in my opinion. We settle into our ruts, believing ourselves incapable, unworthy, ill-equipped or just not “hungry” enough to care! But then who is it have we harmed through our assessment?! We hurt the one we need the most to accomplish things in life, ourself! When we cast doubt, over-analyze  fear, worry, linger in malaise or expect that we are not able, we’re taking the wind out of our own sails! How do we know how far we can go unless & until we try?
If you talk yourself into mediocrity, having or being less, or just plain out of things in general, then that is what you shall have! You have to assume the captain’s role in your own life & decide that you’ll hoist the sails by heading out towards the wind or making your own by turning into the wind! You cannot remain in dock, or even stationary at sea for long, without needing some source of propulsion into the new, the different, the unknown!
You, as the captain, must venture out beyond the safe realm of what you already know, the steady & the certain, CaptJackespecially if that is not where you want to be or what you want! Only you can choose to take your vessel to uncharted places to find your life’s treasure! Those who have what you want, have only done one thing differently than you, they’ve dared to go find it! Now is your turn to dare . . take off the safety reins & let loose your fears, for out there somewhere is what you are either seeking or never even knew you could find! The best adventures in life are those which begin in anticipation, reveal their secrets of fantastic discovery as you go & fill you with the greatness of your accomplishments in the end!
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Donning the Armor of Confidence . .

17 Sunday Feb 2013

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Character, Choices, Confidence, Conquering Fear, Strength

≈ 1 Comment

Confidence in your own skin
Confidence is the wall of strength you build within yourself from the weighty bricks of your burdens, the buckets laden with your fears & the mortar of fortitude in which you push yourself beyond the limits & limitations of your life to date! It is only when you still persist even though you may have your doubts, taking the chance even though you haven’t taken that chance before, that you will in fact develop this skill!
Confidence is the armor you will develop through believing in yourself enough to wage your battles, take on your daily challenges & hone your life skills . . confidence is born only in self-love & built-in self-assurance!
Confidence fights past your fear, overwhelms your doubts & stands at the edge of each precipice imagined without succumbing to worry! You cannot build the confidence you need by living in the constant safety of what you already know you have or can conquer!
Confidence comes only when you dare go beyond the safety of your comfort zones!

Diamonds in the Making . .

31 Thursday Jan 2013

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Change, Character, Choices, Commitment, Conquering Fear, Life, Opportunity, Strength, Trials

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Diamonds-50To endure that which feels like hardship, that which knocks us either around or down for a time in life, is to not let the very hope go out of our live & thus leaving our sails down without hope of finding the wind. We possibly become more brow-beaten the older we get as more happens, so that many of us are actually somber, downcast, unrecognizable versions of who we once were. We start to wear our hard knocks like our clothes & thus, we become sad, tumultuous, angry, bitter, dour or imperiled versions of us!
I took note when reading some of the Bible, how meaningful the stories of those whom endured were to me. I realized that many people in life only learned how to shape & form their character, growing to love God, themselves & others more from what happened to them during hardships & trials. Many of course did not learn at all, going instead to places of discord, unrest & their own version of solitary confinement – choosing to make that part of their story in fact the “whole story” of their life. Some just became worse for the wear surely. But many examples were evident throughout the Bible, as well as in our everyday lives of people who thrive in spite of what has happened. They’ve lived to become shining examples of grace under pressure, appearing to be diamonds who were formed in the worst of times! And there always will be “bad times” at times for us all, no one is immune from that aspect of life! So that is my hope in life for myself. I want to take my sufferings, my pains, my hard knocks & all those things could do me in & make it all instead the cloth which polishes my soul & spirit to perfection like a rare & priceless diamond!
Enduring life is not meant to strip us of our desire to live, but rather to form us into wiser, more compassionate & loving people better prepared to live! Learn to be at peace & contentment with life, to not make each battle one which embitters your spirit & to recognize in the moments you will have to swim upstream with great effort, that even in those moments you are being strengthened for the journey ahead! The saying goes: no diamond can truly be appreciated as first appears, it must endure a process which forms it from onset to what it will become in the end! And so must we . . but it is our choice as to how we shall endure what we must! It is always our choice to look beyond the process towards the end result!_Sign01
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Making Lemonade From Our Lemons . .

05 Saturday Jan 2013

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Character, Choices, Commitment, Conquering Fear, Strength, Trials

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Lemonade-50Making lemonade from our lemons doesn’t mean we’re settling for less, it means we are making the best of whatever comes our way & that is how we make the best of our lives! We can choose to exist & to react . . ways to surely suck the living out of your life! In existing, you relinquish your desire to hope for yet-fulfilled & yet-achieved dreams. You simply stop living in a state of faith & hope t…o sustain that faith, & so your life becomes based in fear, worry, regrets, sorrows, “what ifs” & “why nots”. But when you take back the helm of your central internal emotional command, realizing that although you don’t control everything, you do control your responses, you will start to feel empowered & alive once again!
Don’t slip into existence just because things haven’t always gone your way, reach higher by overcoming your own internal negative gobbledy gook & keep living with the desire to reach all your dreams. Never give up hope, & never let your dreams die! It’s alright to be a realist, but faith doesn’t dwell in reality, it is inherently in the unseen & the unknown, which we all know also includes love, air (hopefully), and some other intangible aspects of life which are very concrete nonetheless! To react emotionally in life is natural, but to stay a prisoner within your emotions because things haven’t always gone your way, or because you’ve received too many lemons & are just sick of making lemonade, will keep you from enjoying your life! You cannot be living in the state of reacting to circumstances without feeling out of control & perhaps a bit victimized.
Flip the way you look at life by seizing the emotional reins & choosing an alternative mood! Life is about making the best of what you have, what you get & what you are facing so that you can feel the best about your life! Isn’t it time you start feeling that empowerment again towards your precious gift of life?! Seize the day, take the control back & live with an awareness that you are going to make a great life for yourself no matter what may come or not come. Learn to savor lemonade . . it’s refreshing after all!_Sign01
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Cheryl Ries-Author & Model

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