So many people take things personally, they feel unforgiving and unrelenting about hanging onto that which they presume hurts them. But in the end, is that an easier choice than just giving others the benefit of the doubt or forgiving them for their lapses? The older I get, the more I learn to let things roll off my back like water on glass. I don’t let things absorb into me as easily or as readily as I once did. I’m still reactive to things in part; but I am trying harder, and with more purpose, to think before I react to what I perceive as hurtful.
It’s not my doing, but this sense of letting go and forgiving more readily comes from growing closer in relationship with the Lord. The more I stem my own self in surrender to Him as the center of my own life, the more I understand the necessity for this. If I’m not the focal point of my own life, then I needn’t take things so personally or seek my own vindication! And if not every thing is about me anyway, then it’s easier to presume others aren’t focusing on me deliberately. Hurts, wounds, and supposed injuries aren’t as common an infliction for me as they once were; simply because I don’t put myself in the center of my universe, my needs aren’t paramount and my feelings aren’t as important or even sure! Maybe forgiveness comes easier to us when we’re not placing ourselves so high up on the scale of importance? We’re able to let others slip up, make their mistakes and live their imperfect lives. And perhaps we don’t assume the worst about others when we’ve learned to relegate our own special interests to a lower rung? It’s not as if others are always aware of us or our expectations, much less so willing to put our needs ahead of their own. If we’re all measured equally in God’s eyes, then why should what I feel or think or do or say be of any more or less importance or value than what others do or say? It shouldn’t!
There is freedom in living without such random triggers of insecurities, doubt, fear and worry; sans my own need for vindication or my measure of joy being contingent upon the words or actions of others! It’s not, my value and my worth comes from God; my peace of mind and joyful spirit are a result of living with trust in Him. I’m not any more or less important in His eyes, so what happens to me is not as important as I may assume. Wanting to move closer towards Him, makes it easier to focus on the many ways I need to mature within! I’ve learned that being wounded, hurt, easily offended or so quick to be angry because of others is not useful to me. I can control my own emotions and relegate them accordingly, because not everything is about my sense of pride. Forgiveness is key, but so is not seeking to find wrongs in everyone else around me! Loving other people means I learn to accept them with more humility; thinking less often of myself and more often of them. Placing myself in the outer ring along with everyone else, while placing God in the center, makes this all so much easier to practice!