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Tag Archives: Success

Baby Steps or Giant Leaps . .

07 Friday Jul 2017

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Attitude, Commitment, goals, Life, Patience, Persistence, Positivity, Success

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Achievement, goals, Persistence, Success

Often times, the person we’re hardest on in this life is ourselves! We set high goals or we have lofty expectations, which can lead us to feel disappointed when we come in with lesser achievements and accomplishments. Perhaps we’re in the process of reaching for more, of going for grander distances, pursuits, and for more overall. We might have wanted to hit some higher mark or reach some bigger result, but we mustn’t forget what baby steps or giant leaps we did take in pursuit of those goals! 

Yesterday, I was wanting to swim a significant distance. I planned on doing a distance swim which would have kept me moving towards an end goal I have for this season’s accomplishments. Last Summer, I had worked up to slightly over two miles of non-stop lap swimming in my pool by the end of the swimming season. I was thrilled to have reached that significant measured distance without stopping! So, this Summer, when the swimming season began back in May, I set out to beat my distance of last year. As of July 4th, just a few days ago, I reached the two-mile mark for non-stop lap swimming in my backyard pool! Pleased as punch with hitting that measurement, I will now endeavor to exceed that goal in my swimming for the remainder of the Summer. In pursuit of that goal though, yesterday’s swim was not as rewarding! I had to stop at 60 lengths of non-stop swimming, as I just ran out of steam before even hitting half a mile! I surely hadn’t fueled my body with proper nutrition for a longer swim. 

With such a brief swim in comparison to my two-mile swim just days ago, I felt disappointed and discouraged afterward. How was it that I could only do so few lengths of the pool just two days later? Well, in hindsight, I realize I am being really hard on myself for disparaging the swim I did yesterday. After all, those lengths I did swim without stopping still are significant! Yes, I wanted to do more, but I just couldn’t. However, I did swim anyway, which was better than not swimming at all! And I pushed myself during those 60 lengths of the pool, so I did give myself a workout in the process, although an abbreviated one compared to the longer swim I had planned on doing! Each swim does contribute to my overall conditioning and my training goals, after all. I just need to accept each day’s efforts as being worthwhile! Going easier on myself is key.  

It’s so easy to be hard on ourselves for not doing more or for not reaching interim goals we’ve set for ourselves. We forget to look at those interim steps we’re taking as being meaningful to the overall end goal. Every single step, no matter the size, is still getting us closer to something bigger. Every single time we participate in our pursuits, we’re developing literal or figurative muscles, which do help us perform more the next time! In my example, I am developing those literal swimming muscles and building my endurance, even if the distances I want to do aren’t always exceeding the last swim I actually did. And, each swim I take keeps me fit and ready for more, as my muscles remember the efforts both greater and lesser. 

We must remember to look at all the steps we’re taking as being successful, in that we’re moving consistently towards a goal ahead, even if some steps are baby-size and others are giant leaps! Each is a contribution towards reaching a goal we deem important for our lives overall! Remember to assess your progress in a way which is more accepting of the baby steps as well as the giant leaps. In doing that, you will be better able to contain your disappointment, to manage your progress, and to preserve your sense of encouragement along the way! Goals are always something we’re working towards, and in my case, even though I hit the goal of swimming non-stop consistently for two miles, I will want to see how much further I can swim non-stop anyway! My goal is inevitably a sliding one, and so my progress should be measured in turn – via sliding steps and flexible efforts! As long as I don’t give up because I don’t always hit my mark, I’m still moving forward towards reaching some end! Baby steps or giant leaps, I’m still making progress!    

A Fissure of Interference . .

06 Thursday Apr 2017

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Attitude, Choices, Confidence, Dreams, Maturity, Strength, Success

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Confidence, Insecurity, Personal Responsibility, Success

Sometimes in life, we’re waiting for the approval or acceptance of others just to proceed. We give others a lot of weight in our lives via that choice to garner another’s approval and acceptance before we act or speak! By waiting on that opinion of another, we often water down our own talent, point of view, or performance accordingly. We become addicted to the verification which another person’s positive feedback, approval, and acceptance of our actions, words, thoughts, or beliefs provide. We often need that before we do what we think we should, what we’re compelled to do! Instinctively, we often know what we should do. We have talents, skills, dreams and ambitions which motivate our actions. But when we filter those internal drives through the perspective, experience, intellect and understanding of others, we create a fissure of interference for our own success!  We don’t need others to tell us we’re able, we’re good enough, we’re talented, or that we’re going to succeed at something! What we really need more than an opinion, a nod of approval or an avowed acceptance from another, is our own confident assurance in what we’re doing, saying, thinking, and believing! When we care too much what others think regarding our lives, we give away our own power to act and we become increasingly more insecure about ourselves!  

 

Wanting approval or being tied to getting acceptance from others is alright if we aren’t relying upon it. If it’s the icing on our cake of already believing in ourselves and feeling secure in our thoughts, actions, speech and behavior, then it’s more than okay! Especially if it comes in the form of compliments and affirmations of our successes! But if getting approval is our usual way of knowing we can proceed or that we should do something, then it’s just a reflection of our insecurity. We need to know how to do, to say, to be, to think, and to feel independent of others injecting their opinions, beliefs, and dreams into the mix! We are unique individuals, which makes it impossible for others to successfully step into our shoes, to know what is best for us in any regard. It is up to us to make the choices, to step forward into the unknown, that each new day represents, with confidence and self-assurance. We must accept the reality that we’ll win some and we’ll lose some, that we’ll be successful and that we’ll fail, as well as that we’re responsible for the way our lives turn out! When we’re children, others step in to make the decisions which we cannot, but when we reach adulthood, it’s up to us to securely accept the role of the manager of our own lives. 

Insecurity is the inner voice which screams, “I’m not ready!” or “Not yet!” or “Should I?”. Insecurity is what blocks us when we endeavor to pursue our dreams. It is the inner force which gives others more credibility when estimating our abilities or our success. It’s the inability to act unless or until others give us their permission or confirm our preparedness or state of readiness. What a terrible way to live, needing others to give us what we should be able to garner from within! If only we would believe in ourselves and give to ourselves the same level of credibility we seem to easily give to others!    

Learning to rely upon our own instincts, to accept responsibility for our own successes and failures, as well as being eager about the personal growth we’ll experience when we do is key. It’s often seemingly easier to give others the burden of our choices in life, as perhaps it will take the onus of accountability from our own shoulders if we do! But in letting others lead us in our own lives, we also miss all the opportunities we have for character development and for reaping the personal rewards of creating success! Step in eagerly as manager of your own life, in doing so, you will have to accept many things which aren’t perfect, all the failings which result from your own choices, and the burden of regret when things don’t go as you hope. But you also get the successes! You’ll get the esteem-building, confidence-affirming realization that you met the challenge, reached new heights, took a daring step, achieved a dream, and grew more in the process!   

THE SEA OF LIFE

05 Wednesday Sep 2012

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Life

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Blessing, Journeys, Life, Success

THE SEA OF LIFE

Life is like a sea, sometimes we are on top of the waves, feeling like surfers tackling our problems and making headway with a big grin for all the success we feel. Other times, the waves are complacent little bobs of nothingness,which although still slight swellings responsible for some motion, which barely take us anywhere and we end up feeling stagnant, like we’re stuck. Then every now and then, we get those tsunamis, sometimes even in clusters of multiples, which not only scare us, but take us so far and so fast in turbulent distress out of our norms, that we are shocked, dismayed, and disturbed by the sheer fact that our sea of life sent them our way. Most of the time, we hope to be in the constant calm of a crystal blue sea, able to see our direction ahead, surrounded by others whom we trust and love, responsible for our own journey with a definable compass and equipment we can rely on, and with the knowledge that we haven’t had any upsetting tides nor stagnant times to stress us. 

When life’s sea sends us in strange and unknown waters, those uncharted and with unknown markers, we can feel fear. We can find ourselves more afraid to proceed in life than ever before . . . and fear is the vast darkness of depths yet unseen. Fear robs us of so much joy in life, it steals our peace of mind and catapults us into places of despair and evil. If you could equate it to the realm of the sea, it would be like finding either a shark’s fin cutting through the water’s surface near you, or even a school of sharks swimming underneath you. Nothing screams more primally of fear than imagining the fear of the top predator of the sea crossing our pathway! Our fears are like that. They live in the darkest recesses for a reason. They prey upon our peace for a reason. They are disturbing and unsettling to us for a reason, they are imagined, they are unseen, they are usually unrealized. So why do they garner so much power? Well, fear is the realm of all the negative thoughts we have, so in that negativity lives all that is wrong within us. 

We can also dwell in the drift of nothingness, when it seems as though the sea hasn’t enough current to propel us anywhere!  We become frustrated and puzzled,wondering how to find our escape, to swim ourselves free from the confines of stagnation! Is that so bad?  Normally we like a bit of calm, but in stagnation, means a floundering without direction, with no definable goals, our aspirations falter and we suffocate when finally, in fatigue, we sink into the endless sea around us.  It’s tiresome and overwhelming, this state of affairs!  We must learn to have faith and to leap forward when life stops dead in its tracks.  There are motors on a sailboat for the times when the wind is not anywhere to be found.  Sometimes in life, we need our plan B’s to guide us to another place where we are more ready to wait out the dead spaces of nothingness which surround us.  Don’t be afraid to use your motor when the sails won’t fill with air!  Call upon the powers which guide you, for me it is God!  Always and forever, I will rely and trust in Him.  Use your strength to move past the moments of stagnancy and consternation, press on!

No matter what the sea of life brings your way, be happy always and thankful for the fact that you are still afloat!  It is important to be grateful for your life, your current circumstances, your blessings, your joys, your family, your friends, no matter what you can say is something of value in our life, even life itself!  Be grateful!  It is better than drowning in the dark sea, giving up, and never knowing the true measure of life . . . promising and beautiful, filled with reasons to celebrate, even the smallest reasons exist in each moment of the day, every day!  Appreciate your sea!   Your waves might become this great set of surfable ones which carry you to a place of previously unknown successes, growth, love, happiness, desire, dreams, and inspiration!  

THE ROAD LESS TRAVELLED

26 Sunday Sep 2010

Posted by Cheryl Ries in Dreams, God

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Dreams, Failure, failure, God, Life, pathway, special, Success, success, unique, Uniqueness, uniqueness, Youth, youth

THE ROAD LESS TRAVELLED

 

Call me special, call me unique, call me one-of-a-kind, but I will not live my life according to the paperdoll cut-out images copied by anyone else!  I want my own life, my own pathway, I don’t want to shadow anyone else . . . I want a life that is authentically mine, not a carbon copy, nor a duplicate, nor a contrivance, but rather, reality . . . my own sweet, messy, sometimes stressful, but always real, and a bit bumpy, less-travelled road!

I’ve had some successes and some failures in my life.  I’ve done good and bad, made my decisions and lived with the consequences.  I will always be the sum total of my choices, combined with genetics and the family life I was given by God.  I am like no one else, but that’s alright by me!  I have modeled my life after no one else.  I have copied no other human being, much less any other woman.  I have made choices which reflect what I needed and wanted at the time, so I must always give myself the credit for living authentically for myself! 

Was I always this paragon of implicit strength?  No.  When I was young, I did what most younger people do, living in some regard swayed by the trends, our friends, our ability to comprehend the world’s influences upon us at each and every new rung of the ladder.  I read magazines, watched videos, dreamt of the day I would be just like the supermodel on the cover of some fashion magazine, or emulating my favorite celebrity, wishing I could have their life.  But I was young and oh so impressionable, that’s what we do when we are younger, we mimic, we learn by observing, we are not yet mature and developed.  Now, because I am happy with being me, I don’t strive to follow any trend, to change my look to suit any other person’s style, nor to be anything other than authentically me!

I choose to live my life being the very best me I can be!  I walk independantly in my own shoes, wanting to set goals and dream dreams which pertain to my desires.  I don’t complicate my life by usurping a friend’s ideas of what life should be, nor assuming their dreams as my own, I let my own roadway play out before me, remembering too that staring in the rear-view mirror of life will just slow me down on my way to reaching my next destination!  I am able to coexist with family, friends, and even my significant other while remaining a separate and distinct person.  If you are not being genuine, nor living authentically, nor discovering what your own dreams look like when played upon the movie screen of your life, then you will never experience the full range of highs and lows on your life’s most thrilling amusement ride!  Give up chasing, with eager intent, someone else’s version of life, make it all your own!  Take the road less travelled, you might just like charting the unknown!

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Cheryl Ries-Author & Model

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